I've fallen so many times before and yet those bruises has not prevented me from falling down again. Why is that so?
Because I seek the wrong cure and medicine. The medication was only temporary, not permanent.
Previously, every time I face any hardship or mishaps, the first cure that I look for is comfort from friends and family. Although it's not wrong, but this does not help me to grow and develop. I became complacent, knowing that some other people have my back if I fall. I cling to these people tightly. (I forgot that they too are human- not perfect)
I was wrong. And I learned it the hard way.
The only being that can help us no matter in any problem is our creator - Allah s.w.t. The only constant being in our life is Allah. I have never felt so confident before. I was constantly worried of what people's perception towards me. But learning what I have learned, I felt relieved and happy despite the deprived possessions I used to have (and took it for granted). I no longer care about the external looks and people no longer intimidate me as much. I learned humility and hard work and determination.
My friend that I ignored all along is the Quran. Sitting there waiting for me to open it, to get hidayah from Allah s.w.t. I found peace and knowledge in it. Its true, in the remembrance of Allah, the heart shall find peace.
I have a long way to go. So many things to learn and hopefully grow with the experience. May Allah grant me strength and success in my mujahadah to fight the external and internal challenges. Amin.
